Tuesday, September 24, 2013

It Only Took 21 Years

21 years of hell, torture, abuse, loss for just one worker, out of countless workers, to finally agree that I and my kids were abuse by my mother.  This is direct from a message from my daughters new worker that I received recently.

" I DO believe that (name removed, My mother) harmed you and the kids.  I have had a chance to go through our whole file, and see many places where there was misunderstanding and miscommunication.  I also see how hard you worked to be healthy and to be able to provide a happy home for them.  I see that moving to (city name removed) was the best thing you could have done, and that setting very strict boundaries between you and (my mother) was a very good choice.  I can’t undo any past decisions, but I hope that we can move forward in a better way."

All my life I have gone through hell thanks to this woman.  3 step kids went through hell, my 3 children went through hell.  Physical abuse, emotional abuse, psychological abuse, sexual abuse, death threats, neglect, denial of basic human rights (roof over our heads, food to eat).  In this blog many of you have read much of the horrors that the 7 of us have had to endure.  Many many many times we sought help.  Me especially to stop the torture.  Only to be ignored, called liars, shunned because of the lies this woman created to cover up what she was doing.  I lost friends, family.  My kids lost so much more.  Their loving mother.  And even when case after case was brought to their attention about the abuse Children's Services continued to ignore the victims.  Traumatizing all of us even more.  A few of us even believe my mother is above the law because she was allowed to do this to so many and no one would listen or help.

Then to receive this.  It seems like such a small paragraph of words.  Not such a big deal right?!.  WRONG.  For the first time in 21yrs of me screaming about the horrors this woman had inflicted on me but also so many others someone in Children's Services actually had the guts to say they believe we were harmed by her.  I can't even begin to explain how those words made me feel.  I had to read them several times to believe their were on the screen. 

Then to make it even better she clearly states that my move to this city and cutting contact with my mother was the best thing I could have done.  WOW.  Both of those decisions were used against me in court.  Twisted around to make it look like I abandoned my kids by moving here and also that I was extremely mentally ill for cutting contact with "family".  I lost the trial because of my mother and how the department lied and twisted things on the stand instead of them truly opening up their eyes and seeing things with an unbias point of view. 

This worker has already, in a couple of weeks, made some decisions that totally go against what the other workers have done.  My daughter will not be tested for Aspbergers, she will be allowed to pursue getting her learners.  My experience, as you have or can read in the blog, with workers and Children's Services has never been a good one.  I have seem huge corruption, liars, workers purjurying themselves on the stand, lack of doing their job in investigating abuse alligations, bias decision making, ignoring of signs and complaints from witnesses of abuse, along with doing all they can to cover up their corruption.  I know CPS is needed.  I will be the first to say it.  I also KNOW that there has to be some good, moral workers out there.  My experience is that they must be few and far between since I have never met one.  But I hope this worker will be different.  The above paragraph is a good start.  My response was this:

"Thank you for your last paragraph.  No one else in the department, over the many years that I have dealt with them(16yrs and up) has anyone ever acknowledge that I, the step kids, and sadly now my kids, were harmed by her.  I believe it was more bias because of me having a mental illness then miscommunication.  (My Mother) had a history with abusing kids severely and still she was seen as a better caregiver then me even though I had NO history of abusing my kids.  The previous workers didn't do their jobs when (My Mother) would make false allegations after visits.  We still have all the video and audio tapes from the visits with my sons and daughter.  Yet at the time (My Mother) would make an allegation and we would offer the video and audio tapes to disprove it and the worker would refuse them and cut visits.  So no I don't see it as miscommunication.  I see it as bias and people not doing their jobs.  I can't and won't sugar coat what the department did to me and my family to tear us apart.   I am still doing all I can to repair the damage done to my family.  I will never stop fighting to bring them all home where they all belong.  I have never given up and never will.  I will be the first to say the CPS is something that is needed, I will also be the first to say that there must be good, decent workers out there.  But that is not my experience.  My experience is that they failed me over and over and over again.  That they failed the step kids over and over and over again.  And then they not only failed my kids but forced them to stay where they were being brutalized and tortured all while I kept telling the workers about what was happening in the home and being ignored.  Then to add insult to injury they ripped the only parent they had from their lives that loved them with their whole heart.  The only way to begin to repair some of the damage caused by all of this is to make a plan to return home my daughter and my sons.

I hope my daughter will not be failed again and that we can all work together to reunite her with her entire family.  Not just bits and pieces.  As long as they are all apart they will continue to suffer.  Whether that is very obvious like in my oldest sons violent blow ups or silently until they can't deal with it any more, they are all suffering."

Reform of CPS needs to happen.  Weeding out the many corrupt workers and putting in place regulations that will not tear families apart unless it literally is a last resort.  Reform that will require proof of the allegations and not just hear say from a vindictive person or worker. 

WOW 21 years.  A long time in waiting.  Now I am waiting for the same from the courts when they return my children home.  Hopefully that won't take another 21 years.

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Friday, September 6, 2013

My Daughters Words: My Real Home

Five visits, just five visits, and I already know where my real home is.

Imagine having something you've always wanted and never knew that it was there, it was yours, but when you want it, you are ripped from it. That is me after ever visit ends.

At night I cry myself to sleep, I admit it. I want my mother, I want my father, I WANT MY FAMILY! But I am ripped from it. Every time I have to leave I feel like I am being ripped from it again, and I can't claw my way back to it.

It just makes me hate that so called "person" more. She did this and we have to pay the consequences.

Yes, where I am is okay, but the adults have chosen child service's side, and I chose my mom's.

I need people to end this! This is making me suffer, my youngest brother suffer, my parents suffer, my two little brothers suffer, and that I can NOT allow. We need more support than ever, we won't stop fighting, but even a battle can be won by evil, and that can't happen now, it will ruin to much.

You can help. Check out my mother's page on Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/HelpBringIsabeauDedrickAndRonanHomeToTheirBrother),
donate here so we can get a lawyer (https://www.fundraise.com/help-bring-isabeau-dedrick-and-ronan-home-to-their-brother/help-reunite-4-siblings?utm_source=created&utm_medium=f&utm_campaign=XfpZ) and keep us in your thoughts and your hearts.

A woman ruined us, but a family will bring us back together.



Above is a post my daughter wrote today to have put up here today.  She wants you to know how she feels.  This week she made another request to speak to her brothers.  Her foster caregiver refused her again.  Telling her she had to write an email to ask permission of the family who has them.  This email of course must be proofed by the foster caregiver since my daughter is not allowed their email.  You can see above how the so call "child protection society" is destroying her.  Tearing her from her brothers as I was torn from them. 

And just think about the two that can't voice their feelings like she can here.  Her oldest brother has become increasingly violent since my visits were cut at social services discretion (not the courts and NOT A COURT ORDER).  They just cut contact of their own free choice.  Now they are doing the same to my children.  My daughter can not tell her brothers why she is being refused contact.  It is just another person who they grew up with, love and have an undeniable bond with being ripped from their lives because it helps to cover up the crimes of Social Services and my mother. 

We as a society need to stop turning a blind eye to this.  We need to take the blinders off and see that the suffering of the children in care is very real.  Feel her words.  Don't just read them.  Feel them.  She is feeling helpless.  We need to show her she is not helpless.  She is not alone and we as a society need to rally around her and help her.

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Wednesday, September 4, 2013

Child Procurement Services = CPS

Today a lady on my facebook posted a link to a documentary about how CPS in the states is legally kidnapping children.  I urge everyone who reads my blog to check out this link and watch the clip.  It is only 15 minutes long but it has real statistics on it and Judges and so on talking about how this industry really does do this for the money. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dGj5QzulMUU

This is from one of the links to the documentary and is started and shown in the video:

"The right to legal counsel, your Miranda rights, the right to a speedy jury trial, are American rights protected by our Constitution. But not in family court, where a single judge can decide whether or not you are a fit parent. CPS services “protecting” children today has become a $29.4 billion dollar industry.

CPS has more power today than the police, sheriff, or FBI, as they can come into your home and remove your child without a search warrant or court order. Someone who doesn’t like you, for any reason, can make a phone call and provide an anonymous “tip” with the result of you losing your children.

As explained in the video above, some of the reasons for which CPS is removing children from their homes today:
  • if the child has low birth weight
  • if the child is over weight
  • if you or your child is mentally challenged
  • if the child is diabetic
  • if you refuse to drink fluorinated water
  • if you eat organic food
  • if you or child is disabled
  • if you don’t vaccinate your child
  • if you homeschool your child"
http://healthimpactnews.com/2013/how-child-protection-services-is-legally-abducting-children-in-the-u-s/

This is not just happening in the US.  It is happening in Canada too and just as bad.  Things have got to change.  Many are still under the assumption that children are only removed from a family as a last resort and this is simply not true.  The word must be gotten out.  The rules of family court must change.  I urge all my loyal readers to pass on my page and the links on this page.  We need to stop allowing families to be torn apart.  The long term impacts on the children in foster care is terrible.  Lets help the children by helping the families fight the corruption!

If you have a story of how CPS legally kidnapped your child you are urged and asked on the video to share it here:  cpsdocumentary@gmail.com

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Tuesday, September 3, 2013

First Days

For many children today is the first day of another school year.  I know it is for my daughter and most likely for my oldest two sons as well.  Another first day of school that I am missing because of so many lies and cover-ups.  Another first day that I am missing because certain people decided to be bias and not do their jobs properly.  Another first day that I am missing because of some caring more about money and less about doing what is right. 

I remember all of my daughters first days of school that I got to be a part of.  The excitement of shopping for that all important perfect outfit.  It had to be just right for her to ok it for the first day of a new school year.  The excitement of shopping for the new lunch box, back pack and all the essentials needed.  Where she got to choose based on her likes and interests.  My daughter was always so excited to start school.  She couldn't wait to get going in the morning.  I remember one morning I got up early to make a nice pancake breakfast for her and found her sitting on the couch all dressed, back pack beside her waiting to go and wondering why we were being so slow.  I remember the first day of school on the year she got to walk to school by herself for the first time.  The school was only a block and a half away, and I could see it from our home but she still felt so grown up being able to walk there by herself even with me looking on. 

I have never got to be there for my oldest sons first day.  None of them.  Are you excited?  Did you pick the all important first day out fit?  Did you get a special first day breakfast?  I know that when we had visits you let me know you hated school.  When I found out it was because you felt stupid.  I quickly figured out why.  My mother was not working with you.  Instead she was making up lies like you being colour blind to excuse away her lack of guiding you and teaching you.  So I made sure to dedicate some of our visit time to helping you learn the things you should have been learning at home.  Which helped me to see that you were not ADHD.  You were dyslexic like me.  You only get upset with learning when it had to do with writing and numbers.  And when I saw how you saw the letters and numbers I knew.  No one would listen to me though.  Not the social worker or any one else I tried to explain this too.  Didn't matter though.  We worked with you and within a few weeks you could print your name, write out the letters and numbers and started to enjoy learning.  I hope the family you are with see's that you are very smart.  You just need guidance in dealing with your dyslexia and once that is given you fly through learning things.  You are so smart just like your sister.  I wish I was there.  I wish I was there to let you know how proud of you I am.  I wish I was there to take photos to remember this day.  I wish I was there to help you prepare.  I hope next year I will be.  I hope it will be all of us as a family getting ready for the all important first day. 

My youngest might be starting his first day of either grade one or kindergarten today as well.  I wish I was there for that as well.  I have missed so much in your young life.  So much taken from us.  I hope some day you will learn the truth.  No matter how much it is covered up the truth is there to see.  This is an important day for all of you.  All of you deserve to spend it getting ready together.  To feel each others excitement, to see each other off.  Some day all of you will be able to have your first day together again. All 4 of you. 

Your sister misses you so much.  She has made many requests to call you only to be either refused or put off because of others excuses.  She has requested all spring and summer to have visits with you.  Only again to either be refused or put off with excuses.  She is so worried that she is going to lose touch with you because of lies and people refusing to do what is right.  I am hoping someone will see this and help all three of you to keep in touch till you all can come home again.

I am sending thoughts of love to all three of you.  Thoughts of support, thoughts of how proud I am of all three of you on this so important first day.  I know you sister knows.  But I hope you, my two oldest sons, can feel it in your hearts.  Know I love you and that has never and will never stop.

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