I feel it in every bone in my body. This will be our year. It will be the year we are finally reunited, my daughter is definitely moving home this summer. You can see that from the latest reply from my daughters worker:
"Also, please remind me closer to the Easter visit to do the letters for you for the school and eye doctor letting them know that you will be resuming care of your daughter in the summer."
So as you can see it is no longer an if. It is a fact. Which puts the spot light on CPS as to why my daughter can return home, my youngest son is here, yet my 2 older sons are not. I am sure that when the couple who has my sons sit down with their worker by the end of January(which she assured me she will be doing) to fill them in on all the facts finally, that they will see that a huge injustice was done to my family. And if they truly believe in the strength of a family they will want to help my sons be reunited with us and come home. I have been begging for the department to tell them the truth, share with them the facts and just how far we are will to fight since I heard they were placed with a family. Everyone who has seen the evidence and knows the true facts, including foster parents and adoptive parents had all said the same to us. That if they were in this couples place and found out the truth they could not morally continue to pursue adoption or keep us from contact.
Last year at this time we only had email or FB contact with my daughter and an adoption worker who admitted to not reading the whole file but had decided that "kids are not removed without a reason." She could not even consider that mistakes could be made, that someone could make false allegations, that workers could refuse to look at video, audio and other evidence that would prove the person making the allegations as lying. She was 100% focused on wanting that adoption bonus. She wanted to adopt out my sons and daughter no matter what. She told me that I would never see my sons again and that I lived in a fantasy world to even think any of my kids would return home. She even told my daughter the exact same things. She even went so far as to threaten my youngest son with telling my daughter "that he just hasn't been taken yet" when there was 0 concerns from anyone. This was recorded by my daughter in secret, which is totally legal since she was a part of the conversation. My community support worker heard the tape and is prepared to testify to that threat on the stand. That is how far this worker was willing to go to cover up what I am sure she had figured out to be gross injustices to my family.
So I guess I am living in a fantasy world since my daughter is returning home. And I will continue to live there as we work to have my sons returned home. We are only 6 months from my daughter being here permanently. 6 months. that is it. So much has changed since a year ago. And I know with everything in the works, that I can't wait to announce to everyone as soon as I am given the go ahead, a lot will change in the coming new year.
This is our year people. With all your support, kind works, dedication to passing on my story and the Facebook page I know this will finally be our year of being a solid whole family.
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This about my life being raised by a severaly abusive mother, my life with an abusive husband and my journey in getting out and away from them and learning to have strength in me.
Tuesday, December 31, 2013
Wednesday, December 25, 2013
Another Christmas and Another Holiday Missed With Their Family
Christmas morning is here and we all had so much fun. But there was obviously 2 very important people missing to make the day complete for everyone. My two older sons. Even their worker said this must be frustrating for me. Frustrating is not the word I would use. I have missed too many holidays with them and my children have missed too many holidays with each other. Saying that it is frustrating is a major understatement.
Even in the excitement of unwrapping there was obvious emotion as we sorted through the gifts, placing my sons aside to get to more gifts for the people here. It seems Children Services do not see families spending this time together as being that important. Yet if you tried to tell them they were not allowed to see their children on Christmas I bet they would get extremely angry. Now imagine being a mom who never abused her children, never did anything to warrant being taken permanently out of her children's lives. Try imagining what Christmas is like then. It is like being continually punished over and over again by my mother for not doing anything wrong. I am not and never have been an abuser, I am not a criminal, I am not an addict, I have always made sure my children had a roof over their heads, food in their bellies and clothes on their backs and knew they were loved. So why can't I be with my children and why can't they be with each other? That is a question that CPS will have to answer sooner then later. Things are moving fast now. Something is on the works that will turn this whole case on it's ear. So keep coming to the blog and looking for updates because soon I will be announcing something that will blow this whole case WIDE open. Something that does not just involved me, but the step kids too and others. So watch, and continue to send your support.
As for this morning we had so much fun. Last night we opened the usual Christmas Eve PJ's. You can see pictures here:
Christmas Eve Pictures
This morning we had to wake my daughter up. She has never been one to jump out of bed in the morning. lol But once she was up we all had lots of fun. I made fresh berry crepes for breakfast with ice cream and whip cream. Everyone got a huge haul of toys but that was not the best part of Christmas.
For us the best part was helping a single parent with two kids have a wonderful Christmas. We love to do secret santa stuff and this year we learned of a wonderful family that needed a bit of help. We got them 2 full large boxes of food, a turkey and tons and tons of gifts for the kids and the parent(single parents lots of time get forgotten). To us all that was the best part of this holiday. We try to instill in our children that no matter how hard things are, or how good things are, there is always someone who has it worse and to always find a way to give back. It is the best part of Christmas.
But then the surprise came right back to us. Someone secret santa'd us a special gift. An X-Box 360. WOW. We all screamed when we unwrapped that. Will be a nice addition to our entertainment room. lol Anyway here are this mornings pictures:
Christmas Morning Pictures
So Happy Holidays or Merry Christmas or what ever you say or celebrate; to all my loyal followers and supporters. We are not giving up the fight to make my family whole. Please continue to send in your supportive words and keep us in your thoughts.
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Even in the excitement of unwrapping there was obvious emotion as we sorted through the gifts, placing my sons aside to get to more gifts for the people here. It seems Children Services do not see families spending this time together as being that important. Yet if you tried to tell them they were not allowed to see their children on Christmas I bet they would get extremely angry. Now imagine being a mom who never abused her children, never did anything to warrant being taken permanently out of her children's lives. Try imagining what Christmas is like then. It is like being continually punished over and over again by my mother for not doing anything wrong. I am not and never have been an abuser, I am not a criminal, I am not an addict, I have always made sure my children had a roof over their heads, food in their bellies and clothes on their backs and knew they were loved. So why can't I be with my children and why can't they be with each other? That is a question that CPS will have to answer sooner then later. Things are moving fast now. Something is on the works that will turn this whole case on it's ear. So keep coming to the blog and looking for updates because soon I will be announcing something that will blow this whole case WIDE open. Something that does not just involved me, but the step kids too and others. So watch, and continue to send your support.
As for this morning we had so much fun. Last night we opened the usual Christmas Eve PJ's. You can see pictures here:
Christmas Eve Pictures
This morning we had to wake my daughter up. She has never been one to jump out of bed in the morning. lol But once she was up we all had lots of fun. I made fresh berry crepes for breakfast with ice cream and whip cream. Everyone got a huge haul of toys but that was not the best part of Christmas.
For us the best part was helping a single parent with two kids have a wonderful Christmas. We love to do secret santa stuff and this year we learned of a wonderful family that needed a bit of help. We got them 2 full large boxes of food, a turkey and tons and tons of gifts for the kids and the parent(single parents lots of time get forgotten). To us all that was the best part of this holiday. We try to instill in our children that no matter how hard things are, or how good things are, there is always someone who has it worse and to always find a way to give back. It is the best part of Christmas.
But then the surprise came right back to us. Someone secret santa'd us a special gift. An X-Box 360. WOW. We all screamed when we unwrapped that. Will be a nice addition to our entertainment room. lol Anyway here are this mornings pictures:
Christmas Morning Pictures
So Happy Holidays or Merry Christmas or what ever you say or celebrate; to all my loyal followers and supporters. We are not giving up the fight to make my family whole. Please continue to send in your supportive words and keep us in your thoughts.
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Thursday, December 19, 2013
"As Of Right Now We Are Still Pursuing The Adoption Of Your Sons"
Not been a good week. Battling the flu right now and found out someone I love dearly has cancer. But this entry is not about that. I wanted to give you all a quick update on the 2 1/2 hour phone call I just had with my son's social worker. So far I am the only one she has talked too other then her supervisor. As of her meeting with her supervisor this past Monday they are pursuing the finalization of the adoption. But that was prior to me telling her of the evidence to the perjury at the PGO trial by my mother and the social workers along with several other avenue's we are pursuing to overturn the PGO and get any adoption that occurred during that false PGO throw out. She seemed nice enough and open. She said she could not commit either way to contact or communication because she did not know the answer at this point. I thought that was fair and better then being told that there would be no communication like I was getting with precious workers. So I see that as not a NO and Not a YES yet.
She is planning to call my daughters worker and talk to her about all this and also will be phoning my community support worker as well. Her meeting with the couple who has my sons is scheduled for the end of January. She will be filling them in on the all the things we are doing to over turn the PGO, my concerns for my sons needs when it comes to therapies and abuses and so on that they have endured and received no help for. She said this was not a discussion she wanted to have over the phone or email. I made it clear that I think they had the right to know everything going on and the long term impacts these things could have before they made a decision to finalize anything. Since this will not be just a simple case of finalizing an adoption but could become a huge legal battle once everything is on the table. That even if it is finalized we will be moving forward to have it overturned and that there is precedence for other cases here in Alberta being over turned based on similar cases and adoptions thrown out and children returned home to their parents. I made it clear I would prefer to work on reuniting my family through CPS because it will be easier on not just my sons but the family who has them.
I also confirmed that my daughter is moving home this summer and her worker and I are discussing the things needed to be set up to make the transition easier. Things like the meeting my community support worker and I are having with her principal here, special therapy, her seeing an eye specialist here and so on. She seemed to be a lot more open then previous workers were and actually was willing to listen to what I was saying. She was surprised that I was not notified that my children were removed from my mother. And was also surprised that I was never told, no matter how many times I contact the towns department, that my children were in foster care. Though she did confirm that I do not have to be notified for the adoption to be finalized.
She will be mailing my daughters gift for Christmas and her b-day(pictures) to her worker to get to her but there would be no other communication during the holidays. Which I know will really hurt my daughter and my sons. I let her know I will be emailing her with pictures from my sons b-days and also from Christmas so they can see that they were not forgotten. She did confirm that she thinks contact was cut between my daughter and her brothers because of her desire to talk about their newest little brother and us to them. Which I made clear I thought was wrong. So I don't know right now what her plan is, or even if she is ready to make one, on contact between them.
I told her that if she needs to meet us that we will arrange that. I also made if clear that we will jump through any hoop requested of us to ensure my sons return home. That I would prefer to work with the family who has them and the department to make the transition for my sons easier then to have to go through the courts and make it more drawn out and painful for everyone. She was not aware of my repeated requests to have my oldest son tested for dyslexia. I offered her the same I did for my daughters worker which was to send her copies of all emails, photos, videos and so on to back up everything I am stating.
I also asked if the adoption will be finalized by the end of January and she said no. She said I gave her a lot to think about and my cases seemed as clear as mud at this point. She seemed as honest and transparent as my daughters worker so far. I hope she is anyway. So I am hoping that as she gets more educated on my case, as my daughters worker did, that she will see that the best interest for all involved is for my sons to return home with all of us working together to help them deal with the past and work in a positive manner for the future. She was made perfectly aware that I have no intention of giving up. She was also made aware that the people who have my sons also have the blog link and the facebook page as well. So they are getting some of the information on here about what is going on, but not all of it as I can't as yet go into the details of some of the other things in the works. So that is todays update. Not entirely bad but not great either.
I am hoping that as the family who has them gets all the details, sees all the proof and so forth that they will decide to not adopt because they will see that coming home is what is best for my sons. And I hope they will work with us to make that transition easier for them. My entire family has been through enough hell. It is time to start the repairing of it.
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Monday, December 9, 2013
The Silver Lining To A Blizzard
We just had a glorious 11 day visit with my daughter, and we can thank a blizzard and her new worker for that. Here are the details. We picked her up on Thursday evening like was scheduled. When we got home and helped her unpack we again discovered she didn't have her medications. So she has been without them all week. We didn't notice any real difference in her behavior without it. In fact she says she sleeps better here without the medication at night then she does with the medication at her foster caregivers. I think that is important to note. And on several occasions she was up on her own earlier then the 9am time that we wake her up. I do think we need to let the doctor know about the evening meds so he can decide whether to reassess. But I also think we really need to find a way to get her medication out here because packing it is not working. She hasn't had any here since summer. I have tried talking to the foster caregiver, the worker and so on. We need a solution because I know this can affect her grades and I don't want people thinking it is because she doesn't want to do her school work or she is acting out or such, when it could be as simple as making sure she has her meds on a consistent basis. I have notified her worker and I am hoping that we can find a solution. I do not think it is an on purpose thing. I think it has a lot to do with the excitement of coming home and it just is not a priority so gets forgotten.
This time she was coming home to a surprise. We got her a whole winter wear wardrobe. And I got them all at a great price thanks to several of the sites I am on for getting good quality used things and some peoples generosity. She was very happy with her new wardrobe. In fact most of the pieces she had never worn those styles but once she put them on she glowed with happiness and in fact she said she looked great. She was complimenting herself for once. It was awesome. Almost everything is name brands and very stylish. Only 4 things didn't fit(we got her over 40 pieces) and one she didn't like. So I think that was a home run. Many pieces are so nice she could go to school or a job interview in. lol She refused to wear any of her old stuff the entire time she was here. And told me that she now fully trusts my shopping for clothes for her because I make sure the pieces would be something that is stylish and would look good on her. So a home run in that department.
Some of my daughters new outfit pictures
She has also made another friend. One of my friends in town is a foster mom who also adopted her kids as well. Her youngest, who is a 12yr old boy, came with all of us to coffee the first Saturday my daughter was here. They hit it right off. So well in fact that the kids went on a father child outing together. The sons father got 4 free tickets to see Thor. So since I had taken my daughter out to the movies in the summer it was decided that she and my partner would go with this boy and his dad. They all had a blast. She also had two of her other friends over for a games night as well. We all played monopoly and had cake. It was a ton of fun. We are planning several activities with this family during Christmas break. Bowling, swimming at the leisure center and New Years Eve pot luck party here at our home and ice skating. So now she has 3 friends and will hopefully meet another one of my friends 12yr old daughter this coming holiday as well. I am trying to help her build a good friend base here so that when she moves home this summer she has friends here already to make the transition that much easier.
We all got to decorate as well on the first Saturday after our littlest one was in bed. We turned up the Christmas music, built our 3D village, my partner did the lights on the tree and my daughter decorated it. She had so much fun decorating and did a fantastic job as you can see in the photos.
Christmas Decorating photos
She also surprise us a few times this week. When the bad weather hit, out of the blue she volunteered to do some of the shoveling and she followed through too. Then on another occasion I was having a bath and my partner was working till nine. I heard her in the kitchen and when I came out she was working on doing the dishwasher. No one asked her she just decided to do it. On another occasion she was in a grumpy mood and that evening out of no where she just said "Mom I am sorry I was so grumpy today." I told her thank you, and that we totally appreciated the apology as well. I love having such a considerate daughter.
I did contact the school with her workers permission because of missing most of the week of school. Two of her teachers sent homework. English and Social. She read what the teach for English sent and then wrote a short story. For social I did tell the teachers she did not have any of her books so he sent about 30 pages to download. Only one segment I was not able to download and print off because I didn't have that program. He asked for her to finish her timeline. I had no idea what he meant by that but he also wanted her to study the rights of the natives and the Metis. So since I had no previous work here for her to do a timeline I asked her to write an Essay instead. Just a page and a half one. That way she could show her teacher she did read the pages and understood them. She asked me what some of the words were and once I explained those she did well. I looked over both but thought she did well on them. Hopefully her teachers are happy with that. I did email them also to let them know she will be here for Christmas vacation so if they could let me know what the homework will be over the holidays and what books she will need during that time then I can talk to her foster caregiver and make sure they are packed so we can work on her homework and help her improve her grades. I did notice that she is still the type of child that works hard for praise. She consistently wants to know what I think and will work hard on her work if she knows I will be going over it. So I am doing the same thing that I did when she was younger if I see a mistake. I point out several of the things she did well, then point out what and why something is wrong and finish it with more praise for the other stuff. In this way I don't get any frustration from her and she is very inclined to work to improve what could be wrong. I don't give her the answers. I don't believe in doing that. Instead I will give her similar examples to work from to figure out the solution. That way she learns the work herself.
She also wrote two letters. One to each of her brothers. I printed those off for her and she has two of her school photos that she wants to include in the envelop. One for each of them. So she is going to give them to her foster caregiver to give to her worker to pass on to my sons worker. So hopefully my sons worker will give it to my sons. I also talked to my daughters foster caregiver and she let me know that the people who have my sons called her. They asked her if my daughter is moving home. I think they are reading it on here and needed verification. She told them that yes she is moving home this summer permanently. This must be very confusing for them. Being told by the crappy original adoption worker all the lies and then seeing the proof of what I have been saying all along. I do feel sorry for them. They do want a family and I hope in the future they get the family they long for. But it will not be my family. My family has suffered enough and we deserve to have our hell finally ended and be all together. My sons will be coming home too. It is just a matter of a few more pieces falling into place and a little time and they will be home too. I just hope they can find it in their hearts for my sons, my daughter and for me to allow us all to finally have a visit this Christmas. That would be a Christmas miracle that our family has waited for, for too long. I have not heard from my sons worker since she told me she is having a meeting with her supervisor and with all the excitement last week I didn't have a chance to email her. So I will first thing tomorrow.
So that was our wonderful visit. She is also considering photography as a hobby. She loves to take pictures and took literally over 200 this past week. Most are really good shots. Now just waiting to pick her up on the 21st. The count down to Christmas begins. It is going to be one of the best in a very long time and if we all get to have a reunion then it will be even better. Keep us in your thoughts that everyone opens up their hearts and allows for all of us to have a visit this season.
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This time she was coming home to a surprise. We got her a whole winter wear wardrobe. And I got them all at a great price thanks to several of the sites I am on for getting good quality used things and some peoples generosity. She was very happy with her new wardrobe. In fact most of the pieces she had never worn those styles but once she put them on she glowed with happiness and in fact she said she looked great. She was complimenting herself for once. It was awesome. Almost everything is name brands and very stylish. Only 4 things didn't fit(we got her over 40 pieces) and one she didn't like. So I think that was a home run. Many pieces are so nice she could go to school or a job interview in. lol She refused to wear any of her old stuff the entire time she was here. And told me that she now fully trusts my shopping for clothes for her because I make sure the pieces would be something that is stylish and would look good on her. So a home run in that department.
Some of my daughters new outfit pictures
She has also made another friend. One of my friends in town is a foster mom who also adopted her kids as well. Her youngest, who is a 12yr old boy, came with all of us to coffee the first Saturday my daughter was here. They hit it right off. So well in fact that the kids went on a father child outing together. The sons father got 4 free tickets to see Thor. So since I had taken my daughter out to the movies in the summer it was decided that she and my partner would go with this boy and his dad. They all had a blast. She also had two of her other friends over for a games night as well. We all played monopoly and had cake. It was a ton of fun. We are planning several activities with this family during Christmas break. Bowling, swimming at the leisure center and New Years Eve pot luck party here at our home and ice skating. So now she has 3 friends and will hopefully meet another one of my friends 12yr old daughter this coming holiday as well. I am trying to help her build a good friend base here so that when she moves home this summer she has friends here already to make the transition that much easier.
We all got to decorate as well on the first Saturday after our littlest one was in bed. We turned up the Christmas music, built our 3D village, my partner did the lights on the tree and my daughter decorated it. She had so much fun decorating and did a fantastic job as you can see in the photos.
Christmas Decorating photos
She also surprise us a few times this week. When the bad weather hit, out of the blue she volunteered to do some of the shoveling and she followed through too. Then on another occasion I was having a bath and my partner was working till nine. I heard her in the kitchen and when I came out she was working on doing the dishwasher. No one asked her she just decided to do it. On another occasion she was in a grumpy mood and that evening out of no where she just said "Mom I am sorry I was so grumpy today." I told her thank you, and that we totally appreciated the apology as well. I love having such a considerate daughter.
I did contact the school with her workers permission because of missing most of the week of school. Two of her teachers sent homework. English and Social. She read what the teach for English sent and then wrote a short story. For social I did tell the teachers she did not have any of her books so he sent about 30 pages to download. Only one segment I was not able to download and print off because I didn't have that program. He asked for her to finish her timeline. I had no idea what he meant by that but he also wanted her to study the rights of the natives and the Metis. So since I had no previous work here for her to do a timeline I asked her to write an Essay instead. Just a page and a half one. That way she could show her teacher she did read the pages and understood them. She asked me what some of the words were and once I explained those she did well. I looked over both but thought she did well on them. Hopefully her teachers are happy with that. I did email them also to let them know she will be here for Christmas vacation so if they could let me know what the homework will be over the holidays and what books she will need during that time then I can talk to her foster caregiver and make sure they are packed so we can work on her homework and help her improve her grades. I did notice that she is still the type of child that works hard for praise. She consistently wants to know what I think and will work hard on her work if she knows I will be going over it. So I am doing the same thing that I did when she was younger if I see a mistake. I point out several of the things she did well, then point out what and why something is wrong and finish it with more praise for the other stuff. In this way I don't get any frustration from her and she is very inclined to work to improve what could be wrong. I don't give her the answers. I don't believe in doing that. Instead I will give her similar examples to work from to figure out the solution. That way she learns the work herself.
She also wrote two letters. One to each of her brothers. I printed those off for her and she has two of her school photos that she wants to include in the envelop. One for each of them. So she is going to give them to her foster caregiver to give to her worker to pass on to my sons worker. So hopefully my sons worker will give it to my sons. I also talked to my daughters foster caregiver and she let me know that the people who have my sons called her. They asked her if my daughter is moving home. I think they are reading it on here and needed verification. She told them that yes she is moving home this summer permanently. This must be very confusing for them. Being told by the crappy original adoption worker all the lies and then seeing the proof of what I have been saying all along. I do feel sorry for them. They do want a family and I hope in the future they get the family they long for. But it will not be my family. My family has suffered enough and we deserve to have our hell finally ended and be all together. My sons will be coming home too. It is just a matter of a few more pieces falling into place and a little time and they will be home too. I just hope they can find it in their hearts for my sons, my daughter and for me to allow us all to finally have a visit this Christmas. That would be a Christmas miracle that our family has waited for, for too long. I have not heard from my sons worker since she told me she is having a meeting with her supervisor and with all the excitement last week I didn't have a chance to email her. So I will first thing tomorrow.
So that was our wonderful visit. She is also considering photography as a hobby. She loves to take pictures and took literally over 200 this past week. Most are really good shots. Now just waiting to pick her up on the 21st. The count down to Christmas begins. It is going to be one of the best in a very long time and if we all get to have a reunion then it will be even better. Keep us in your thoughts that everyone opens up their hearts and allows for all of us to have a visit this season.
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Thursday, December 5, 2013
Another Entry By My 15yr Old Daughter: Leaving Hell's Kingdom
This entry is by my daughter. I will post my thoughts at the bottom. The only changes is to names and places.
Many wonder if when you die you go to Hell; some wonder if you can leave it as well. I didn't have to die to go to Hell, and I have left it.
It was May, I was twelve, my brothers were six and three. My grandmother had been doing her usual; pinching my ears and dragging me all over the place. She liked to blame me for things that either she did to make an excuse to hurt me, or things she knew other people did to hurt me. Everything involved either physical, emotional, or both pain.
One morning her husband drove me to school, I was ready to present my planets projects. I had been working on it really hard at the school library. I had been doing really well at science. I had found out I was interested in astrology and astronomy. I desired to be an astronomer. My grandmother told me that I would fail at it. I would fail at everything.
I got to school and walked to my locker. It was empty after my grandmother had arrived at my school and had humiliated me in front of everyone at my school because of my messy locker. I grabbed my English and social stuff, We had been learning about Athens and story writing. Kids sneered at me as I past them. My grandmother had done enough to make me hated at school.
Class passed by without much problems. I gathered my science stuff, ready for my project to be presented. I had studied Uranus as the planet I was interested in. I got to class a few minutes early and sat down in my desk at the front. My eyesight had started to decline and I was places at the front desk.
The presentations went by quickly. Most were five minutes long. Finally all Uranus people were called up. A boy and I went up to the front. I was picked to go first. I handed out my paper to everyone about my planet. I put up the slideshow, a large blue planet with rings going around it was brought up. So I started. My project was at least fifteen minutes long. Most of the students were in shock. I sat down and listened to the rest of the projects, proud that I had succeeded on one thing.
I remember that after we were given a worksheet on the planets. It was fifteen minutes until lunch. My teacher tapped on my shoulder. I turned and saw worry in her eyes. She told me to gather my stuff and put it in my locker. I was needed in the office. I did as she told me and was led to a room with a man and a woman sitting in it on comfy looking chairs.
I sat down and watched them for a moment. The man said something and we had small talk. A few minutes later they looked at me and told me that I was being removed from my grandmother's house. I was shocked. I asked what happened. They said that they had evidence that my grandmother was abusing me. I asked them if they had already picked up my brothers. My youngest brother yes. My other brother was still at school. I said that they could tell me the details later. I wanted to see my brothers without my grandmother separating us.
I was taken over to the elementary school, we sat in the lobby. Memories of being in elementary school arrived like a tsunami. I wanted to see my brother mom. The principal walked to us with my brother beside him. I got up and ran to hug my little brother. I hated that I was finally allowed to hug him when we had been removed. We went to the Children's Services Office. Our social worker was standing there.
Our social worker explained that we were being removed from my grandmother. My youngest brother played with some toys. I listened to everything he had to explain. I had always hated him. He twisted everything. Finally he left to get lunch, McDonalds in fact. I read to my brothers while waiting to have a bite to eat.
Finally he returned and I filled up on lunch. I had been eating very little with my grandmother making me eat no dinner. We got in a car and were driven to a smaller town. A woman stood in the front of her house, the very house we were going to. She looked old and walked with a cane. We unloaded all of our stuff, including my garbage bag of few clothes and one blanket.
Her house was large and very clean. there were two girls already living there. She had a fancy cat three and a female white cat. I was shown into the guest bedroom. They had a large trampoline, a quiet basement and a twin bedroom that my brothers would be sharing.
The woman went into the kitchen with the people who dropped me off. In a few minutes I was called into the kitchen. Little did I know that I would be experiencing the worst thing ever to happen to me.
I sat down at the table and listened. They told me that they were going to separate me from my brothers, that another family was going to take me. I felt like a possession, an item sold and bought by many owners. I argued and told them that I had to be there for my brothers, that they needed me. They wouldn't listen.
The next day I gathered what little things I had and put them in the vehicle that was there to take me to the foster home I live at now. I turned to my younger brother and told him that I was going away for a while, but that I would be back. My youngest brother cried as I hugged them both. I sat in the car and watched as I was driven to the new family.
I remember that the new family had to pick up their son and daughter. I needed to get a frame I had forgotten. AS I left for a second time I asked how long my youngest brother had been crying. They told me the whole time and he hadn't stopped. My younger brother had a glassy dead look in his eyes.
That was the day I was permanently removed from my grandmother and my brothers.
When she read this too me I was so angry. This happened only a few months after the trial where the judge had said it was bad for their mental health to be removed from my mother. Which is because he would not allow my witnesses to testify to what was actually happening in that home. If he had he might have seen the horrors this woman was doing to my children. But instead of finally being able to be saved from her grandmothers abuse, children services continues the mental abuse with keeping her separated from her brothers. If they had just told me that they were taking the kids from her and that they had screwed up royally and given me my children back so much pain could have been stopped from happening. But no. They had to continue covering their screw up making my children suffer for more years to come. My children need to be reunited. My sons need to come home where there sister will be permanently in a few more months.
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Many wonder if when you die you go to Hell; some wonder if you can leave it as well. I didn't have to die to go to Hell, and I have left it.
It was May, I was twelve, my brothers were six and three. My grandmother had been doing her usual; pinching my ears and dragging me all over the place. She liked to blame me for things that either she did to make an excuse to hurt me, or things she knew other people did to hurt me. Everything involved either physical, emotional, or both pain.
One morning her husband drove me to school, I was ready to present my planets projects. I had been working on it really hard at the school library. I had been doing really well at science. I had found out I was interested in astrology and astronomy. I desired to be an astronomer. My grandmother told me that I would fail at it. I would fail at everything.
I got to school and walked to my locker. It was empty after my grandmother had arrived at my school and had humiliated me in front of everyone at my school because of my messy locker. I grabbed my English and social stuff, We had been learning about Athens and story writing. Kids sneered at me as I past them. My grandmother had done enough to make me hated at school.
Class passed by without much problems. I gathered my science stuff, ready for my project to be presented. I had studied Uranus as the planet I was interested in. I got to class a few minutes early and sat down in my desk at the front. My eyesight had started to decline and I was places at the front desk.
The presentations went by quickly. Most were five minutes long. Finally all Uranus people were called up. A boy and I went up to the front. I was picked to go first. I handed out my paper to everyone about my planet. I put up the slideshow, a large blue planet with rings going around it was brought up. So I started. My project was at least fifteen minutes long. Most of the students were in shock. I sat down and listened to the rest of the projects, proud that I had succeeded on one thing.
I remember that after we were given a worksheet on the planets. It was fifteen minutes until lunch. My teacher tapped on my shoulder. I turned and saw worry in her eyes. She told me to gather my stuff and put it in my locker. I was needed in the office. I did as she told me and was led to a room with a man and a woman sitting in it on comfy looking chairs.
I sat down and watched them for a moment. The man said something and we had small talk. A few minutes later they looked at me and told me that I was being removed from my grandmother's house. I was shocked. I asked what happened. They said that they had evidence that my grandmother was abusing me. I asked them if they had already picked up my brothers. My youngest brother yes. My other brother was still at school. I said that they could tell me the details later. I wanted to see my brothers without my grandmother separating us.
I was taken over to the elementary school, we sat in the lobby. Memories of being in elementary school arrived like a tsunami. I wanted to see my brother mom. The principal walked to us with my brother beside him. I got up and ran to hug my little brother. I hated that I was finally allowed to hug him when we had been removed. We went to the Children's Services Office. Our social worker was standing there.
Our social worker explained that we were being removed from my grandmother. My youngest brother played with some toys. I listened to everything he had to explain. I had always hated him. He twisted everything. Finally he left to get lunch, McDonalds in fact. I read to my brothers while waiting to have a bite to eat.
Finally he returned and I filled up on lunch. I had been eating very little with my grandmother making me eat no dinner. We got in a car and were driven to a smaller town. A woman stood in the front of her house, the very house we were going to. She looked old and walked with a cane. We unloaded all of our stuff, including my garbage bag of few clothes and one blanket.
Her house was large and very clean. there were two girls already living there. She had a fancy cat three and a female white cat. I was shown into the guest bedroom. They had a large trampoline, a quiet basement and a twin bedroom that my brothers would be sharing.
The woman went into the kitchen with the people who dropped me off. In a few minutes I was called into the kitchen. Little did I know that I would be experiencing the worst thing ever to happen to me.
I sat down at the table and listened. They told me that they were going to separate me from my brothers, that another family was going to take me. I felt like a possession, an item sold and bought by many owners. I argued and told them that I had to be there for my brothers, that they needed me. They wouldn't listen.
The next day I gathered what little things I had and put them in the vehicle that was there to take me to the foster home I live at now. I turned to my younger brother and told him that I was going away for a while, but that I would be back. My youngest brother cried as I hugged them both. I sat in the car and watched as I was driven to the new family.
I remember that the new family had to pick up their son and daughter. I needed to get a frame I had forgotten. AS I left for a second time I asked how long my youngest brother had been crying. They told me the whole time and he hadn't stopped. My younger brother had a glassy dead look in his eyes.
That was the day I was permanently removed from my grandmother and my brothers.
When she read this too me I was so angry. This happened only a few months after the trial where the judge had said it was bad for their mental health to be removed from my mother. Which is because he would not allow my witnesses to testify to what was actually happening in that home. If he had he might have seen the horrors this woman was doing to my children. But instead of finally being able to be saved from her grandmothers abuse, children services continues the mental abuse with keeping her separated from her brothers. If they had just told me that they were taking the kids from her and that they had screwed up royally and given me my children back so much pain could have been stopped from happening. But no. They had to continue covering their screw up making my children suffer for more years to come. My children need to be reunited. My sons need to come home where there sister will be permanently in a few more months.
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Tuesday, December 3, 2013
A Tribute To A Very Dear Friends Stolen Angel: You Will Never Be Forgotten
As many know my blog is about many things but usually about the abuse of 7 children by one woman, the struggle with dealing with a corrupt system and the fight to have my children returned to me. My daughter has also gained much by being able to share her thoughts and her feelings on here as well. But today's post is something different.
Todays is a tribute post. A post dedicated to a beautiful angel that was born to a very loving family. An angel that was born with many struggles that her family tried all they could do to help. An angel that had a mother that loved her so much that she made the hardest decision a mother could ever face just to try and make sure she got all the help she possibly could. An angel that ended up suffering in such horrific ways because of a corrupt system. A system that made it next to impossible for her loving and devoted mother to protect her. And a system that ended up causing this beautiful angel to leave this earth way too early.
This angels name is Samantha Martin. She passed away on December 3, 2006. She endured so much neglect from the people that her loving mother had entrusted with her care. Her mother was promised, assured and out right lied to that she was receiving all the medical attention that her mother was not able to access for her. Only to find out after her beautiful angel passed away that not only did the worker not see her daughter for 14 months, that she didn't even see a doctor for 3yrs. A beautiful angel who only deserved the best in life failed in the most important ways and a loving mother who had her hands tied from stopping it.
But even in her grief, that is still as fresh and painful as it was on the day of her passing, this loving mother sends roses to the medical staff who tried valiantly to save her daughter's life. So even in so much pain she is still thanking those people that tried so hard for her daughter. And that is something I see so often in this beautiful angel's loving mother.
Her loving mother is one of the most incredible women I know. Her name is Velvet Martin and I consider my world richer in so many ways because I can call her my friend. She has helped change laws in her daughters name:
Samantha's Law: Samantha's Law
But even with doing that she also finds time to help other families in their struggle against a system designed to pull families apart instead of working to keep them together. She always finds time to answer the smallest question, finds time to be a shoulder to lean on, finds time to give support and encouragement. In every act she does she is keeping her beautiful daughter's name and life alive in the here and now. I know in our home everyone knows who Samantha is, so do our friends.
On this day that I know brings my friend so much sadness, I want her to know that not only is she an incredible woman to be admired but that she created a beautiful daughter who, if she had been able to be here would be so very proud of her mother. You both have and are changing the world and changing the world of many families and children. I am honored to know you.
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Todays is a tribute post. A post dedicated to a beautiful angel that was born to a very loving family. An angel that was born with many struggles that her family tried all they could do to help. An angel that had a mother that loved her so much that she made the hardest decision a mother could ever face just to try and make sure she got all the help she possibly could. An angel that ended up suffering in such horrific ways because of a corrupt system. A system that made it next to impossible for her loving and devoted mother to protect her. And a system that ended up causing this beautiful angel to leave this earth way too early.
This angels name is Samantha Martin. She passed away on December 3, 2006. She endured so much neglect from the people that her loving mother had entrusted with her care. Her mother was promised, assured and out right lied to that she was receiving all the medical attention that her mother was not able to access for her. Only to find out after her beautiful angel passed away that not only did the worker not see her daughter for 14 months, that she didn't even see a doctor for 3yrs. A beautiful angel who only deserved the best in life failed in the most important ways and a loving mother who had her hands tied from stopping it.
But even in her grief, that is still as fresh and painful as it was on the day of her passing, this loving mother sends roses to the medical staff who tried valiantly to save her daughter's life. So even in so much pain she is still thanking those people that tried so hard for her daughter. And that is something I see so often in this beautiful angel's loving mother.
Her loving mother is one of the most incredible women I know. Her name is Velvet Martin and I consider my world richer in so many ways because I can call her my friend. She has helped change laws in her daughters name:
Samantha's Law: Samantha's Law
But even with doing that she also finds time to help other families in their struggle against a system designed to pull families apart instead of working to keep them together. She always finds time to answer the smallest question, finds time to be a shoulder to lean on, finds time to give support and encouragement. In every act she does she is keeping her beautiful daughter's name and life alive in the here and now. I know in our home everyone knows who Samantha is, so do our friends.
On this day that I know brings my friend so much sadness, I want her to know that not only is she an incredible woman to be admired but that she created a beautiful daughter who, if she had been able to be here would be so very proud of her mother. You both have and are changing the world and changing the world of many families and children. I am honored to know you.
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